?

Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Caring and sharing

because I'm a beast and never post.
I’m an insomniac, it’s no big deal. It started with Nightmares when I was about 4. I used to wake up every night screaming “Mommy Mommy Mommey – I mean Daddy Daddy Daddy” Dad always came, Mom never did. Eventually they gave me a kitchen knife to scare away the thing that I was afraid of. I got the idea and stayed very quiet from then on. So now when I wake up from a Nightmare I just go “Hunnn” or “Gehhh” or something like that – just a loud expression of breath. I also stay frozen in one place. By the age of 8 I realized that if I only slept for 1.5 hours I wouldn’t dream. You can train yourself to do almost anything.

So now on a “good night” I’ll get up 3 times. On a bad night 5. On a really bad night I’m up every hour. Oddly enough I’m at my happiest, and I am the most fun to be around after a really bad night. That’s when I am at my most high energy, when I’m the most funny and charming. I travel for work, and my boss’s daughter (who is usually my room mate) has noticed that- I think it irritates her.

To this day most of my dreams are nightmares, and they don’t really bother me. Well they do or they wouldn’t be nightmares, what I really mean is they don’t stick with me. It’s like “Ok so I had a dream that so and so was trying to kill me. Big deal.” It’s the nice dreams that I find disturbing, the nice dreams that stick with me and make me go “well what was all that about?” My last nice dream was about a month ago and I can remember every second of it (If you were wondering it involved Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles, my husband and the Dallas Stars – yeah OK I’m a freak, but if you hadn’t figured that out yet shame on you!).